Relationships are a necessary part of the human experience. Whether we like to admit it or not, we all need them. Not all relationships are created equal though. Healthy relationships grow you, while toxic ones break you down, leaving you damaged. So how can you tell the difference between the two? Here are 12 signs of a healthy relationship. Now, if your relationship doesn’t have all 12 of these elements, right now, that doesn’t mean it isn’t healthy. We’re all a work in progress. Hopefully, you are actively working towards them.
Reciprocity
Any healthy relationship should be give and take. Not to say that it’s going to be a 50/50 split, but both parties should be giving and receiving. If you find yourself in any relationship where you’re constantly giving, but aren’t receiving, or vice versa, that’s not a healthy relationship. While you can’t change people, you can bring the imbalance in the relationship to their attention. If things don’t change, it might be time to consider your options.
Communication
Communication is an important key in any relationship. How will you know each other’s likes and dislikes, dreams or future goals if you don’t communicate? You can’t truly get to know another person without communication. If you don’t really know a person, you won’t know whether that person is an asset to your life or a liability.
Respect
It’s hard to build anything worthwhile with a person who doesn’t respect you. Respect is defined as “having due regard for the feelings, wishes, rights or traditions of others.” It’s hard for you to be sold out to anyone who doesn’t have any regard for your feelings and wishes, especially when you’ve communicated those things to them.
Trust
Trust is the true cornerstone to any healthy relationship. It’s the main element that all the others build upon. Vulnerability, communication, authenticity all require trust. Trust is built off one’s repeated consistency, over time.
Fun
Whether it’s friendship or a romantic relationship, if you’re not having fun, something is wrong. Now, I’m not saying every second of every minute will be a party, but you should be having fun somewhere in your relationships. If you’re not experiencing any joy at all, it’s probably not healthy.
Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a key sign of a healthy relationship. Here’s the ugly truth – people are going to hurt you. And you’re going to hurt people. Many times it’s not even intentional – it’s the unfortunate byproduct of us being imperfect humans. For the relationship to grow, you can’t keep a laundry list of the other person’s wrongs. You have to be willing to forgive and let go, if you plan to move forward. Now, I’m not talking about being a doormat and allowing someone to intentionally and repeatedly hurt you in the same way, over and over again. No one should accept that kind of behavior. I’m talking about letting go of those unintentional offenses that come with everyday life.
Authenticity
You can’t grow in any relationship where you have to pretend to be someone else. If you can’t be yourself, what’s the point? Pretending to be someone else is fun for Halloween, but sucks in real life. Being able to be authentically yourself is an important part of being in a healthy relationship.
Vulnerability
Healthy relationships help make you a better person. In order for another person to help you though, you have to let them in to see the bad and the ugly. Most of us love to show others our good, but many of us hate to reveal our hurts, warts and weaknesses. In a healthy relationship, you should be able share those things, without fear of being judged, criticized or rejected.
Truth
The ability to, respectfully and lovingly, speak truth to one another is necessary in a healthy relationship. And truth isn’t always pretty. You can’t, however, build a real relationship off of lies and make believe. Your ability to be truthful with one another is essential to a healthy relationship.
Peace
Nothing healthy can survive in a chaotic environment, including a healthy relationship. Now, a peaceful relationship doesn’t mean it’s easy and that there are no problems, but you have an assurance in it. You’re not uneasy about it. You can rest in it. It’s not tumultuous. It’s not toxic. It’s stable.
Growth
Iron sharpens iron. Anything living and healthy grows. Your relationships are either adding or subtracting value. There’s no such thing as a neutral relationship – it’s either building you up or breaking you down. A healthy relationship will help you soar to higher heights.
Patience
Since we’re all a work in progress and are at various stages of growth, any healthy relationship requires patience. We don’t pick up bad habits overnight so we’re not going to break them overnight either. You have to be willing to be patient with those you’re in relationship, as they grow, and vice versa.
What are some other signs of a healthy relationship? Drop your comments below.
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