If you want to do yourself a huge favor, unlearn all the mess and bs you were taught about success. Don’t worry, I’m going somewhere with this. If you’re anything like me, you like predicable outcomes. I look at this as a side effect of the Type A, control freak personality. If you want A, B, C and are told X, Y, Z will get you there, that’s exactly what you’re going to do. However, if you’ve been around for any period of time, you’ve probably also figured out that there’s no one-size-fits-all recipe for success, despite what all these “success gurus” have told you. And honestly, some of them are probably lying – very few of them ever seem to mention their losses, failures, and blunders. Add gender and race to the mix and you’ll learn, real quick, that while “leaning in” might work for some, it doesn’t work for everybody. So, where does that leave you in your quest for success Sis? It leaves you unlearning all the mess and bs you were taught and chartering your own course for success. Here’s where to start:
Define Success for Yourself
Mainstream society has held the American Dream up to most of us as the epitome of success – get a degree, get a good job, get married, buy a house with a white picket fence, have 2.5 kids, get a dog, make as much money as you can and live happily ever after. And while there’s nothing wrong with that, if that’s your dream, make sure it’s your dream. For many of us, if we stop and really think about it, we don’t want a dog or a white picket fence. And that’s ok too. Bottom line, you have to define what success looks like for you. For you, success may look like gaining financial freedom and retiring by 40. For others, it might be starting your own business and growing it to the point where you’re able to pour back into your community. At the end of the day, you have to define what success looks like to you, for yourself. Period.
Success Has No Clock
This is a huge one. If you pay attention to main stream media and these “bizphotainment” magazines, you’ll be led to believe that, if you haven’t achieved success before the age of 30, it’s never going to happen. Sis, let me be the first to tell you, that’s a lie. If you’re still living and breathing and haven’t achieved the level of success that you’re looking to achieve, there’s still time. Success doesn’t have a clock or expiration date. Some of us find it early in life, while some of us find it later. Either way, it’s ok. Your journey isn’t meant to look like everyone else’s. You’re not losing if your success comes later than everyone else’s.
Age Ain’t Nothin’ But a Number
This kind of piggybacks off the last point – there’s no age attached to success. If you haven’t found success by a certain age, that doesn’t mean it’s passed you by. You were put on this earth, for a purpose. If your purpose finds you later in life, that’s how it was meant to work out. Bottom line, no matter how old you are, success can happen to anyone, at any time, so long as you don’t give up.
Roadmaps and Recipes
Now, while success looks different for everyone, I do believe that success leaves roadmaps and recipes. Some of the common ingredients you’ll find in most people’s success stories are perseverance, adaptability and commitment. Like many destinations, there may be several routes one can take to arrive at success, but some of the key instructions will always be the same.
What is some of the mess and bs you’ve had to unlearn about success? Drop a comment below.