Dear Black Women

Dear Black Women: Burn Those F*ckin’ Capes!

June 26, 2021

Dear Black Women

One thing I’m hoping that Black women do from this day going forward is this: burn those f*ckin’ capes. Most Black women suffer from Superwoman Syndrome – carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders, fighting everyone else’s battles, yet not getting the same in return. Why do we tend to show up for everyone else, at the expense of ourselves? Sis, stop trying to save everybody else, and save yourself. Burn the f*ckin’ capes!

 

Stop Showing Up for People Who Don’t Show Up for You

Black women show up. I think it’s partly because we know what it’s like not have people show up for us. While showing up for others is great, be sure you’re conserving your energy and showing up for those who show up for you. If you’re constantly giving out, but aren’t getting anything in return, you’ll soon be depleted. Pour into those who pour into you so that you never run dry.

 

Pick Your Battles

Sis, I know you feel like an indefensible superhero because “All your life, you had to fight” (said in Sofia voice), but you don’t have to fight every battle because not every fight is yours. Pick your battles. Before you jump into the ring, ask yourself, “What do I have to gain from engaging in this battle?” If the answer is nothing, stay out the ring and burn the cape.

 

Stop Dealing in One-sided Situationships

Black women, in my opinion, have some of the biggest hearts in the whole world. We tend to be very giving and nurturing by nature, many times, even when we’re not getting the same, in return. This isn’t reserved exclusively for romantic relationships – it’s friendships, business relationships, work relationships, etc. Stop dealing in one-sided situationships that don’t benefit you. If you’re not receiving reciprocity, it’s definitely time to reevaluate some things. Burn that cape and stop swooping in to save one-sided relationships.

 

Stop Trying to Save Every Damn Body

Whew chile… this is the one right here. Sis, please stop trying to save every damn body. Yes, you may have all the solutions to other people’s problems, but if they don’t want to do or be better for themselves, there’s nothing you can do about it. Please stop trying to save folks who don’t want to save themselves.

 

Have you been guilty of engaging in Superwoman Syndrome? Are you still suffering or have you burned your cape? Drop a comment below – I’m trying to see somethin’.

Jessica R. Simmons

Jessica is a lawyer who enjoys writing, loves to laugh and have a good time and appreciates a good cocktail. She can almost always be found somewhere reading, talkin' trash and/or sharing good resources.

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